Guilty Pleasure

Is it just me or does anyone else feel sort of secretly happy when Oprah gets fat again??
I figure that with all of the tools at her disposal, she should be able to keep the weight off. Simple folks like me , who cannot currently afford their YMCA membership, at least have a more viable excuse for being pleasantly plump.
She's never even given birth ! I still like to use the excuse that I have some " baby weight " left. The only problem is that my "baby" will turn 20 years old next month--so that one doesn't fly.
I really and truly hate exercise. I've done it for years but mainly because other people felt that I should.
My heart is healthy and my bones are in great shape. Shouldn't that be enough?
I think Oprah and I should get together and down some of those mashed potatoes that she's always spoken so fondly of. I am sure she can get us into restaurants that I wouldn't otherwise be able to patronize. Come on , Oprah, eat up!